whine-o

march 17, 2011

currently at the gt libs at 6:32 AM, studying for my EMOP (electrical, magnetic, and optical properties for you non-techies, and yes, we have a whole course on these properties of materials) and history tests which is going down in T minus 5.49 hours. started off the night complaining about electrons and the stupid Schrödinger equations that i had to memorize. i seriously was staring at a page of scribbles in utter confusion and depression because i knew i was going to fail my test. but my friend, roscoe (he's cool because he's in a "band" and roscoe is not really his real name. i just like to call him that.) explained all this gibberish to me. and i am now wide awake because i am starting to understand everything. science, physics, and electrons are so interesting. lately, i've been complaining about my course load and about having to learn all these nonsensical properties of electrons. probability density, Hamiltonian operators, infinite potential barriers, thermionic and field emission, electron hole charge carriers, doped n-type and p-type semiconductors, conduction and valence bands, Fermi energy levels, blah, blah, blah, etc. but i think i am beginning to appreciate all of this more and more. when i understand what i'm learning, i get really really excited. not only because i might actually get a decent grade on my test, but because i really truly am intrigued and amazed by the science and math of it all, and i actually really love my major. sigh, i am so bipolar. mse and i have this love/hate relationship. i hate this stuff ... no, i actually really like it ... oh but these derivations! ugh ... nahhhhh, it's alright. anyway, i was getting really frustrated this week with my mse classes. so much that i was considering changing my major, even transferring, or just dropping out of school. i don't want to do derivations the rest of my life!!! but ... i love my major. for now :)

april 6, 2011

test scores are out! I ACED BOTH OF THEM. which is pretty freaking incredible considering i totally bombed the last EMOP test and barely passed my history test. eek! happy happy joy joy :-) roscoe and i shall study together again for the next test! and we will eat junior's breakfast platters just like last time, hehe.